Something I need to tell you all
19th March 2014
… HAH, that got you reading didn’t it?
Now, just then, you were expecting to read some awesome hidden secret of mine. You were hoping for something juicy, something controversial, something embarrassing. It got you all excited as you pondered as to the possibilities of what it could be? “Is Ian going to tell us he likes men?” or “Did he have sex in a toilet last night and feels he needs to share?”… Yeah yeah, I know what goes through your heads you creative minded individuals.
However, that’s not to say I don’t have anything to tell you. I still might have some deep dark secret that I’ve been waiting to share for oh so long. That one fact about me which I feel requires sharing to the world. Something cooped up inside of me, something I feel so strongly about that even though I’ve kept it secret for so long, it’s only fair that I share it with the people of the earth so I can live a guilt free life of no secrets and lies. THE WORLD MUST KNOW.
So maybe I’m going to tell you. Maybe not. Well, actually I am. But it’s ‘WHEN?’ That’s the real question. Do I do it now? Sure, why not? But I do think you deserve to wait. I mean sure you’re probably frantically scrolling down to the bottom of this blog in the hope that you can read it as the last thing and just continue browsing Facebook, and Twitter, and Tumblr, and Pinterest, and The Mail Online, and… Oh god, you’re boring me with your internet antics. Oh stuff it, I’m going to just tell you… The other day… I…
Fook. I forgot. I actually forgot what I was meant to tell you. Oh my god, that’s so embarrassing. I’m highly embarrassed right now, that’s so unlike me. It was really good too ‘n all. Damn. *thinks hard* Nope. Nope. It’s definitely gone. Oh well, it’ll come back to me I’m sure. If I remember it though, I’m probably just going to say it on Twitter to be honest – easier that way, soooo y’know, if you want to know (that thing I said I wanted to tell you (which I forgot (silly me))) then just follow me on Twitter @ianpartickroe.
Sheesh. I’m an idiot.